Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

This weekend I went to Daehongo in Seoul with some friends. The area has all sorts of theaters and art galleries throughout. We decided to go to a show described as a "romantic comedy" in a little theater we stumbled across. Judging from some of the Korean media I have been exposed to, I knew the show was going to be entertaining. Did it live up to my expectations? Indeed. The plot revolved around a woman who was unhappy with her seemingly abusive husband so she and her pigtailed maid devise a plan to kill the husband by poisoning him. The maid presents a man to pretend to be the husband as a cover for their crime (it was obviously the same actor just with nerdy glasses on). Long, complicated story short, they kill the husband along with his flamboyantly gay friend--not really sure what the flamboyance added to the plot but it provided for a good laugh. And what's a "romantic comedy" without a twist at the end? Turns out the maid, husband, and gay friend were all in cahoots to take the main character for everything she had. And wait...another twist! Jokes on the 3 criminals because the main character was an undercover police officer. All in Korean, I was able to make up corny dialogue in my head. The acting was so over the top though that I was able to decipher the story line. The best part was the special effects. Whenever there would be any kind of fight scene, the lights would flicker and house music would come through the speakers. I never thought I'd see a play where the producer found a way to include Prodigy's "Smack My Bitch Up" as part of the score. At one point, they used a strobe light and basically just busted out a party. I think the term romantic comedy got lost in translation. Love, lust, greed, and murder all in the confines of this living room set.




The seats were quite uncomfortable and we were sort of caged in to this box seating area. No one over 5'9" allowed.



This image does not really capture the space but I literally could not move my arm back enough to take a better picture.

One of the main theaters is going to be showing "Grease." I can't even begin to imagine how amazing that will be. I will be purchasing my tickets very soon.

Some odds and ends

Even though I have not been here for very long, I have picked up on many Korean habits, inclinations, and overall cultural differences that have kept me on my toes since arriving.

1. No concept of space order or personal space.
First of all, lines do not exist. Well, they exist in the sense that sometimes whatever waiting area one may be in is so narrow that a “line” is formed. However, there is no differentiation between the first and the last person in line. If you feel like going, you do. It’s completely incredible to observe. The first time I experienced this phenomenon was my first day in Seoul, waiting in “line” to buy something. As I’m about to pull out my wallet, some woman waltzes right in front of me and places her items on the conveyor belt. I was dumbfounded. At the time I thought it was disrespectful, and specifically directed at me because I am clearly a foreigner. Turns out, cutting lines does not discriminate. It happens to anyone and everyone. It is so very much the norm, though, that the madness is the method. Everyone gets a turn and you don’t hear any moaning or groaning about cutting. It works. The next spacial issue is a complete disregard of personal space. If you’re in someone’s way, you will just get pushed aside, sans excuse me, pardon me, etc. Trying to get off the subway is practically a death wish. People pushing you to the left, to the right. I was trying to get off of an extremely packed subway car when I suddenly felt a harsh pounding against my hip. I looked down only to see a 4 1/2 foot old woman trying to shove me aside. Guess what I did? That’s right, I shoved her right back...it is survival of the fittest in this place.

2. Heated floors.
Koreans seem to do a lot of things right, and their method of heating is definitely one of them. The heat comes through the floors. Not so convenient when you are my training roommate, Sophie, and myself, trying to figure out how to work the heat. Because there was no instrument blowing hot air into the room, we couldn’t hear the heat being turned on. We ran around our hotel room, like the blind leading the blind, trying to find where this mysterious hot air was coming from, assured that we had pressed the correct button. We later came home to a hot room: what? where’s it coming from (while taking our shoes off) ahhh, the floors! Genius. The method is actually very efficient: I have kept my room on the lowest setting at 45 degrees Celsius, turning it off occasionally, and my room has been cozy and warm. It also seems to promote my system of trying on clothes and leaving them on the ground. They feel like they’re fresh out of the dryer. Who doesn’t love that?

3. Extreme customer service.
Having worked in sales for years, I can appreciate good customer service. It does annoy me at times, but I prefer help over being ignored. Being here, all I want when walking into a store is to be left alone. There is literally one salesperson every square foot. Inch toward one rack, a lady is on top of you, trying to force a coat on your back. All I can do is say “Anio, Anio” (no), shake my head and hands violently, and hope they back off. I haven’t had much luck in that department.

4. Personal questions.
Some of the questions I have gotten from my students include:
How old are you?
Are you married? Why not?
Are you rich?
Keep in mind this is all within a day or two of meeting the kids. And no, it is not one of those “kids say the darndest things” situations. These are actually commonly asked questions among Koreans. In the US, we would be inclined to avoid asking as well as answering any of these quandaries. Asking age is most common because this is the way to distinguish how the person should be addressed. In Korea, you only bow to your elders, and it is considered inappropriate to bow to people who are “below” you. So for instance, it would be appropriate for my students to bow to me, but not me to them. The rich question has been directed at me because Koreans generalize all Americans to be wealthy. When I told them that in Chicago, I see many more homeless people than in Incheon or Seoul, they were shocked. By the way, I have seen maybe 3 homeless people since I have been here.

5. Germophobic discrepancies.
If you read earlier, you most likely saw the pictures and stories about swine flu paranoia. The swine flu makes the cleanliness and germ fixation very salient, but other instances of a clean-obsessed culture include the fact that Koreans wouldn’t dream of stepping foot into someone’s home, and many restaurants, without removing their shoes first. Additionally, Koreans refuse to touch their food with their hands. To any of my friends who know how I eat understand how this “hands are not meant to be utensils” rule is very burdensome to me. On the other hand, the neurosis is inconsistent. Food cannot be touched, but it is all shared. People double dip, lick their chopsticks, stick them back into the dish, and so on. At dinner for two, most of the time the server will give just one mug with water for the two to share. I just recently found out that most restaurants clean the dishes with cold water instead of hot...who even knows if they use soap. Diverging practices about germs, all wrapped into one big weird custom of cleanliness. My germophobe of a brother would die.

For your viewing pleasure...

I went up to my rooftop yesterday to get some pictures of Incheon. Here they are






Pretty amazing, if I do say so myself

I walked around and snapped some pictures as well. Most of these are of the square which is just an area in the center of this part of Incheon filled with basic life essentials: food, alcohol, coffee, and karaoke.






Ooh look even a swanky night club (I think)



These are just some night views of the square from when my coworkers and I went out last night

Guess Who

One of the most entertaining aspects of my new job are the names of the children. They obviously have Korean names, but upon beginning class at Chungdahm, they are instructed to choose an “English” name, just as someone named Joe would go by Jose in Spanish class. Because the Korean to English translation is no where near as simple as English to Spanish, the kids can basically choose any name they want. The winner of the best name choice goes to Elvis. On top of that, I started to notice a strange theme within the name choices. I have several Sallys and Harrys, two Dianes, two Glorias, Cindy, Susan, Lucy, to name a few. These names are not uncommon, but they are definitely not the most popular within that generation. I mean really, when was the last time you met a 9 year old named Harry? or Gloria? Other than that...I saw a pattern: does anyone else think that these sound like the names of the characters from the game, Guess Who? I think that every student at my school thought, hmm, what should I name myself? Let me just look at this popular Hasbro game to pick out the appropriate name. Either that or a trendy name book from 1970.

CRIBS: Korean Edition

So, this is kind of embarrassing that I took a video of myself filming my apartment. It was originally intended for my parents and sister to see because I knew they were curious. I didn't realize videos couldn't be attached to emails...whoops. I decided what the hell and put it up for everyone to see. So anyway, here is my apartment in Incheon.
Warning: if you tend to be envious of really sweet cribs, you probably should stay away from this

Smooth Sailing

I got through my first day of teaching without a hitch, for the most part. Training really built the classroom experience up to be something that it is not. I was under the impression that if I didn’t prepare, I would be running around like a chicken with my head cut off. No. Turns out, not surprisingly, I overprepared. Somewhere between Chicago and here I forgot how comfortable I feel around kids. I decided to put my foot down at the beginning to ensure no problem kids. Let me tell you, I really know how to lay down the law.
In my first class, the kids began to warm up toward the end and really became responsive and enthusiastic. My second class, I had no such luck. Apparently, the older the kids, the more difficult it becomes. We’re talking 6th graders, here...yea, what a pain. In their defense, I would not be too keen on sitting through more class in addition to public school from 740-1040 pm. Students in Korea usually go to 4 or 5 academies (such as CDI--my employer) after school. Their schedule runs something similar to this: wake up at 6am, go to public school at 7am-230pm, return home for lunch, then go to academy or institute classes (like English class, math and science class, etc.) until 10 or 1030 pm. They then return home and do homework. The average grammar school Korean student gets around 4 hours of sleep! Oh and by the way, this is 6-7 days a week. If I don’t get 8 hours of sleep I am a miserable waste of life. So, I am trying to keep their stressful and exhausting lives in mind when in the classroom.
The branch that I am working at seems great so far. My two bosses are extremely kind and laid back. The first thing my branch manager said to me was “do you drink? good, do you eat meat? good.” Sounds like my kind of man. They are throwing me a welcome party on Friday so I will be able to get to know my coworkers a little better. Also, most branches work on the weekends, but Mark, my boss, vetoed that. So no weekend work, plus I don’t have an evening class on Fridays, meaning I am off early. Things are really looking up for me....I’m making millions, remember.
I do not currently have internet in my apartment, so this is being written from a nearby coffee shop where I get a wireless connection. I have gone to a coffee shop every day since I’ve been here to get my internet fix and maintain my sanity. I am a fiend for the world wide web. I will write and post pictures about the city I am in, Incheon, and my apartment soon.

Mommy, Look What I Did!

Not to worry, I passed my Chungdahm Institute official training. After completing the final tests and final mocks for the classes I am going to be teaching, I signed my life away, so to speak, to a branch in Incheon-Namdong. I guess you could say I have a real job, that is a strange realization. When I come back to the states I will tell prospective employers that my last salary was millions/month (leave out the currency). It was sad leaving everyone from training. Most people that are in Seoul are going to try to get together tonight for a celebration, so hopefully we will all be able to keep in touch.

My roommate, Sophie, and I before leaving (notice the sad bus in the background). As she would say, see you in a few.